


I Won't Say I'm In Love

by Pokeluv101



Category: Servamp (Anime & Manga)
Genre: M/M, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-03
Updated: 2017-11-03
Packaged: 2019-01-28 23:36:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12618108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pokeluv101/pseuds/Pokeluv101
Summary: Some things were better off never spoken. Lawless could never say he was in love. It hurt to much. But his Subclasses were determined to make him admit it.





	I Won't Say I'm In Love

"Lichtan, I'm home~" Lawless said in a songful tone as he walked into their hotel room. He was expecting Licht to yell at him or kick him but only silence greeted him. The room was dark and empty which was strange to Lawless. It was too early for Licht to be asleep but Lawless didn't turn on the lights in case he was. As quietly as he could, he opened the door to Licht's room and peered in.

"Is my Angel-chan sleeping?" Lawless asked the dark room but there was no response. He walked into the room and turned on the lights only to find that it was empty like the rest of the hotel room. Something close to panic tugged at his heart and he dashed out of their room. Where could he be?

Lawless had been at his part time job most of the day but their contract would've told him if something happened to Licht. Kranz would've told him if they going to leave the hotel as well. His mind raced, trying to think of where Licht could be.

"Gil!" Lawless saw his Subclass at the end of the hallway. He ran quicker and grabbed his arm. "Have you seen Lichtan? He's not in his hotel room."

"He's downstairs. He overheard the manager talking about how the singer canceled on him and he offered to play the piano for them." Gil told him and could see the stiffness leave Lawless's body. Any worry he had was quickly masked with a cocky grin.

"That's my Angel-chan. He won't refuse the chance to play the piano for anyone. I wish he would call me before he wonders off like this. I keep telling him that we can't be apart but he never listens to me. Next time, tell me if he goes anywhere so I don't have to run around looking for him. You call yourself my Subclass but you never think of me."

The words triggered a memory for both of them and regret crossed Lawless's face. It was only for a brief moment but Gil recognized the grief. Lawless clicked his tongue and quickly regained his usual expression. "I'm going back to my room. I'm tired from work."

"You don't want to go watch Licht play?" Gil asked and Lawless yawned exaggeratedly. It had been a long time since Gil had seen Lawless worry about his Eve and he didn't know if he was right to be hopeful. His Servamp could be irritating and a brat at times but Gil wanted to see him happy.

"Maybe I should. We don't know when I'll get bored of him so I should listen to his music while I still can." Lawless joked but still walked towards their hotel room. He only stopped when two of his other Subclass blocked his path. Their large whale costume didn't allow him to walk around them.

"Maybe he'll last longer than the others." His Subclass wearing a green whale costume insisted and Lawless rolled his eyes.

"Does it matter how much he outlives the others when the end is still the same? Lichtan might go on and on about being an angel but he's still human. He'll die eventually but he goes on living his life like it actually means anything. His delusions are almost laughable but entertaining." Lawless tried to walk past his three Subclasses but another two stopped him.

"You've only been in a contract with him for a month. Give him time before you judge him." One of his Subclasses began to lecture him and Lawless sighed. He didn't understand why they would always treat him like a child when he was their Servamp and master.

"If there's a prize for rotten judgement, I guess I've already won that. I know the truth now," Lawless said bitterly. He had seen with his own eyes what came to people who tried to make something out of their worthless lives. "No one is worth the aggravation. That's ancient history. Been there, done that."

"It's okay to try to love someone again." Gil told him and something snapped in Lawless. He forced his way through his Subclasses, intent on returning to his room to be alone. They followed him and he screamed over his shoulder.

"Stop spewing nonsense.  _To be wise and love exceeds man's might._ " Lawless quoted. He didn't know if he was speaking to his Subclasses or trying to remind himself of what he thought was truth when he said: "I'm not foolish enough to love. Who even said I fell in love with that delusional angel, anyways? He's just a little entertainment for me. He's a way for me to kill time, nothing more."

"Who d'you think you're kidding? He's the earth and heaven to you." One of his more persistent Subclasses followed him and Lawless groaned. The other Subclasses followed his lead and it was obvious that they weren't going to leave him alone. "Try to keep it hidden, honey, we can see right through you. You can't conceal it. We know how you're feeling and who you're thinking of."

Lawless walked out of the hallway and into the lobby, hopeful that they wouldn't follow him. His hopes were dashed when they surrounded him. He was forced to face them. "Just drop it guys. I don't feel that way. There's no chance, no way. I won't say it. No, no."

"You swoon, you sigh. Why deny it?" One asked.

"It's too cliché." Lawless clicked his tongue at them. "I won't say I'm in love because I'm not in love."

Lawless saw an opening between his Subclasses and he used it to escape. He found himself running but he didn't know if it was from his Subclasses or his feelings. He wasn't sure how long he had ran or how far until he ended up on roof. He looked up at the full moon but its beauty did nothing to console his heart. The moon had been full when…

"Don't think about it! It doesn't matter and thinking about it is pointless." Lawless ordered himself and leaned back against the door. He thought that his heart had learned its lesson about love. But it feels so good when you start out that even wise people forget to be wary of love. His head screamed over his heart,  _Get a grip, man, unless you're dying to cry your heart out again._

"There's you are!" Lawless jumped when he realized he wasn't alone on the roof anymore. One of his Subclasses was pointing an accusatory finger at him. It was a silly scene and Lawless would've laughed at his own situation if it wasn't for the confusing emotions inside his heart. "Lawless, you can't deny it: who you are and how you're feeling."

"I'm not—"

"Lawless, we're not buying that." Another of his Subclasses interrupted him. "We saw you hit the ceiling."

"Just face it like a grown up." Gil said. "I saw how you looked at her— how you look at him. When are you going to own up that you got it bad?"

"No chance! No way! I won't say I'm in love!" Lawless walked off the roof of the hotel, hoping to escape his Subclasses in the crowded street. Why were his Subclasses being so persistent? They should know as well as him that nothing good could come out of becoming attached to a human. But, despite his own insistence, he felt conflicted.

"Don't be a fool, Lawless. You're not in—" Lawless couldn't complete his sentence when he came face to face with Licht. He stood in front of a billboard promoting Licht's next concert. The serene expression he had and the lights illuminating him made Licht look like an angel.

He tried to remind himself that human life was a finite thing and no human could use it to create anything of themselves. Everything they did could be undone by the action of another. But those thoughts weren't as convincing when he was staring at Licht. He said that he only wanted to entertain himself with Licht but could he want something more from Licht?

Did he want Licht to prove him wrong?

"You call yourself an angel but you're really the devil whispering promises to me, aren't you?" Lawless thrust his hands into his pocket and forced himself to turn away from the billboard.

"Given up on running now?" His Subclasses were behind him and only spoke when he turned. They knew that he was most likely confused by his own feelings but he had to face them. One of his Subclasses patted his head. "Give up. Give in. Check the grin, you're in love."

"You guys been watching too many romantic movies. Even if this was a great Shakespearean romance, this scene won't play. I won't say I'm in love. Now stop following me."

"You're doin' flips. Read our lips: 'You're in love'."

"You're way off base. I won't say it so get off my case! I won't say it!" Lawless walked back into the hotel, hoping to lock himself in his room and away from his Subclasses. He was glad they didn't follow him but he could hear Gil's voice trailing after him.

"Lawless don't be proud. It's okay, you're in love."

Lawless couldn't understand how Gil could say that with any conviction. Love? The admittance of that short word doomed people to disappointment. Even someone as powerful as a Servamp. Love could fade. Love could leave. Love could die. But no matter how it ended, someone was left to grieve. He wouldn't be that person again. By not admitting to the feelings within his heart, he could assure himself of that.

The soft notes of a piano made him look up and he saw Licht. It wasn't a poster, but instead the person haunting his heart. He had intended to return to their hotel room but found himself going to Licht instead. Even without the expert lighting in the poster, he looked like an angel. He was focused on his piano so Lawless doubted Licht knew that he was watching.

"I won't say I'm in love." But like every time he heard Licht's music, Lawless felt overwhelmed with emotions. Licht seemed to put his honest feelings in his song and Lawless couldn't help but respond in turn.

His whisper was drowned out by the music. "At least out loud, I won't say I'm in love."

**Author's Note:**

> I made a post about making this fanfic a long time ago and only now got around to writing it XD I love Disney and just thought of this concept while watching Hercules (way too underrated). I usually use "Hyde" instead of "Lawless" but at this is before the Greed Pair arc and it seems more appropriate to use Lawless.
> 
> This might be my last time writing a songfic because it was kind of difficult to incorporate all the lyrics naturally into the story and dialogue.


End file.
